Advice: Being overly nice can be a problem

As parents, we want our children to be kind, but we also need to make sure that they know how to defend themselves.

Sometimes overly nice children put the happiness of others first and they forgive friends that don’t deserve it.

Not everyone will have your child’s best interest. It is important that you teach your child how to stick up for himself.

If your child has a friend that continually hurts him, explain to him that sometimes we need to cut unkind people out of our lives. And that this is OK.

Part of life is learning to choose friends that support and love us as much as we support and love them. One-sided relationships are not healthy.

Nice people have a hard time saying no to others, because they risk not being liked. They are people pleasers, and feel guilty when they put themselves first.

If your child struggles with this, have him or her practice saying “no”. So that when they have to talk to their friend, they feel more comfortable.

When you see your child is uncertain about making a decision ask her, “Is this something you want to do? Does this make you happy? What does your gut tell you to do?”

It’s important that your children learn these skills at a young age. So that when they hit the teen years, they don’t find themselves in situations they can’t handle.

Being nice is a positive character trait. You just need to make sure your child learns how to stand up for himself so others don’t take advantage of him or her.

Maria Luisa Salcines is a freelance writer, and certified parent coach with The International Network for Children and Families in Redirecting Children’s Behavior and Redirecting for a Cooperative Classroom. Follow her on Twitter @PowerOfFamily, Instagram mlsalcinespoweroffamily or contact her on her blog FamilyLifeandFindingHappy.com.