Advice: Love is not just for the young

MARIA LUISA SALCINES | SPECIAL TO THE MONITOR

When I was in my 20s and would see couples in their 50s or 60s being romantic, I would say to my husband, “That’s you and me someday.”

I grew up watching my parents hold hands when they watched television. I remember my mom always walking my dad to the door and kissing him goodbye before he went to work. On weekends — rain or shine, summer or winter — my parents took off to their condominium at the beach.

My dad use to tell us, jokingly, “Don’t show up without calling.” They actually loved when we showed up in the summer. I know, however, they enjoyed having their alone time.

When you’re raising a family, it’s easy to lose touch with your partner. It’s difficult to feel romantic when you have a little one on your hip and a toddler wrapped around your leg.
As rewarding as raising children is, it’s exhausting.

The secret to a lasting relationship is keeping the flame alive. I always remind young women in my office that raising children is temporary, but their marriage is forever.

A couple has to support and love each other and have to give 100 percent. You have to both care about what your partner is feeling and needing. When you both do this, you both win.

Happy couples learn how to give each other space, while also putting their relationship first.

Having separate interest is great, but if you live separate lives, eventually you will go on separate paths or become more like roommates.
The reason so many people feel that there is no romance in their life after marriage is because they stopped trying.

When my kids were teenagers and they caught us kissing in the pantry, they would roll their eyes. But now, they get it. They understand that love and passion doesn’t disappear because you get older.

My kids know that on the weekends when we take off to the ranch that they had better call first before they come over.

Happy love month, especially to the old man that still makes my heart feel young.

Maria Luisa Salcines is a freelance writer and certified parent coach with The International Network for Children and Families in Redirecting Children’s Behavior and Redirecting for a Cooperative Classroom. Follow her on Twitter @PowerOfFamily or on Instagram @mlsalcines. You can also contact her on her blog FamilyLifeandFindingHappy.com.