Different Parenting Styles Not Always a Bad Thing

My family and I have taken memorable vacations with my parents, brother and his family. Luckily, we are all in sync and our vacations are very peaceful.

Family vacations build strong relationships and priceless memories. Spending time together gives your children the opportunity to get to know their grandparents and extended family and friends in a relaxed setting.

But what happens when you take a vacation and you realize that your sibling's or cousin's kids are out of control?

All of a sudden the long talks you had with your children about manners and not breaking rules are forgotten and your children go crazy. They start acting just like their unruly family members or friends. You try talking to them, you threaten, but it's hard to get them to behave when their peers are getting to do whatever they want.

If you find yourself in this situation and you don't want to ruin everyone's vacation, relax and try to enjoy yourself. As long as your children are not in any kind of physical danger and are not being disrespectful, let things slide. Spending a couple of weeks staying up past their bedtime, eating junk or watching more television than you allow at home is not going to cause any major harm.

Sometimes, spending time with a family that has different parenting styles can make you aware of some of the things you might want to change or it can affirm that you are doing a good job with your children.

Don't spend your vacation telling your sister, friend or cousin how out of control their children are. Just accept them as they are. If they ask for advice, share your parenting tips, but don't judge or criticize their children.

If your children do something that is unacceptable, discipline them as you would at home. Let them spend some quiet time in their room and remind them that even though they are not at home your family rules still apply.

Don't discipline someone else's child unless you have a very close relationship and you both agree on the rules.

Your children will not be warped for life by what they learn from the cousin or friend they see once a year. Throughout their lives they will come in contact with people who have been raised differently.

After the vacation is over, talk to your children about the things they did that were not appropriate. Once you get them home it won't be difficult to get them back into their regular routine.

To enjoy a vacation with friends and extended family you have to keep an open mind, and remember the reason why you're spending time together.

Someday when your children are older they will look back and remember those summer vacations spent with their loved ones. Shared memories, love and commitment to your family and close friends, that's what life is all about.

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Maria Luisa Salcines is a freelance writer, certified parent educator and corporate empowerment consultant with The International Network for Children and Families in Redirecting Children's Behavior, Redirecting for a Cooperative Classroom, and Redirecting Corporate America. Contact her at her Web site at www.redirectingchildrenrgv.org.