'Wicked – Her Secret Words' By Lina Suarez

her secret words, they glare at me

and sneer within

how I am wicked,

more wicked now

to opt living in sin.

and then

I never hear her

say the words,

but I know, I must know

she is displeased.

I come from a long line of sinners.

el mal hecho is in my blood.

Before, I’d been groomed to be a nun

but bad habits, they became me.

I am her bad habit.

I am, even at her death.

this pobre m’ija, ingrate

so, her devotion

is failed instead.

wicked, como mis padres and

wicked, as my women of blood,

full of mal hechos

and so far from God’s.

Her secret words - I never hear her

say the words – but I know, I must know

I am not the saint

she thought of me.

I’m not saying I ever was.

maybe it’s not too late

to be

the monja

I’d been groomed to be.

somewhere beneath my open stare

me bendice

with her secret words

and I know, I must know

I am too wicked

to be the woman

she meant to be.